Social Media ruins everything.

Or at least people will try to twist the things you put on social media to paint you in a negative light even when it’s the most positive prideful post you’ve ever made. I had a Facebook “friend” do this to me recently. I have a pretty good hunch as to who it was and I still can’t understand why it was done. I think it was more a projection of their own feelings onto my situation than anything. You see I’m proud of my kid for growth in all areas, not just at his preferred position in baseball. There is value to be had in understanding the game from many different perspectives on the field. In the end, I think that makes a better player.

It all started with this picture and this post I made on Facebook.

“There is my kid out of focus in the background, not playing first base or short stop like he's gotten used to in the last two seasons. The reality is he's on an all star team full of infielders and they can't all play first. He still does occasionally, but sometimes (or often) he's in right field. He may be in the top 12 8U kids in all of Manchaca, but he's like number 10 of the 12 and there are only so many infield positions.

Let me tell you what I see here. It looks like an awesome first baseman getting out the runner on first, but what I see is the boy in the background who played first base now playing right field. What I see is a boy who before this season didn't totally understand how to back up the positions around him. I see a boy backing up the first baseman, just in case. I see a boy who can throw from right field to third base with ease. I see growth and a better understanding of the game. He gets that whole team player thing a bit more. I'm pretty freaking proud of that boy.

I've witnessed other team's coaches have spats with their other coaches because their kid isn't playing in the infield. The honest truth is it's hard to see your kid play a position that seems less than the one they played in regular season. I get that. He wasn't always happy about his position, but he learned in his first tournament that there was something valuable to be had here even if he wasn't at first (I may have threatened to bench him, if he threw his head back at getting sent to the outfield one more time). All Stars has been a challenge for all of us (mentally), but we've chosen to focus on the opportunities for growth and encourage him to focus on that too.

We just ended the regular ALL STARS season in FIRST PLACE. Next week we play for the Championship. Keep backing them up Bubs because that's what wins games... and championships hopefully.”

I got such positive responses from many of my sports friends on Facebook.

They were proud of him too. They were proud of me for understanding that every position is important and trying to teach my child the same thing. That’s a rarity these days and it’s hard to get into that mindset when we live in a world of “me first” mentality.

Success takes a team, not one or two glorified positions

The thing I didn’t expect was the “friend” that took this post, misinterpreted it (hopefully not maliciously) and told the coach I was complaining on social media about my kid playing in the outfield, causing drama for the entire team because the coach brought it up with everyone instead of just me.

Part of me wanted to just blow it off and forget about it, but we were going into a championship weekend of game play and it was a conversation I had to have with the coach for the sake of my child. There are two things you don’t mess with and that’s my children and my house. I will come at you like a spider monkey.

If you’re going to go tattle on someone, at least share the post and not your interpretation of it.

I put all of this out there for a couple reasons.

We get caught up in all of the competitiveness of youth sports these day. We want our kid to be the best of the best and play the best positions, but not everyone thinks their kid should have to earn it. We try to teach our child that those things don’t come free and understanding the entire game makes you better at the position you play. He’s come a long way and worked hard, but you have to keep the effort up or others will pass you up. As parents we need to drop our ego and support our kids.
Don’t be a Karen on social media. Check yourself. Are you projecting your own insecurities onto someone else? Maybe it doesn’t mean what you think it means and maybe you shouldn’t try to break down a whole team of boys who worked hard for what they have because you somehow feel less than. I’m still waiting on an apology.

…and don’t F#<& with my children.

I started this week on the struggle bus. I’ve been looking forward to dance and baseball because I love watching my kids do what they love, but this week marked the start of nearly 2 months of straight crazy.

I’m owned by my kids’ activities every single week night between now and the end of October. I definitely need the shirt that says “I can’t, we have baseball (or dance).” And to top it all off, I dropped the ball on night one of children’s activities by showing up at the end of ballet class instead of the beginning. Turns out I saved the time incorrectly in my calendar 2 months ago when we registered. It didn’t go over real well with my little ballerina.

So I’ve been over here this week letting it eat at me. How are we going to get through the next 7 weeks with any level of sanity left to show at the end? No doubt it’ll end in exhaustion for both me and the kids.

But then I remembered something. Yes this is going to be hard for the next 7 weeks and yes it’s okay to acknowledge that and know that it’ll be stressful at times, but these are just small things when all is said and done.

I know that in hindsight I probably won’t even remember the rushing through dinner, homework and showers so we could fit everything in. I won’t remember how I screwed up the first day of dance (unless that one kid never lets me live it down, which is very possible). I won’t remember how I sent my kid to baseball in dirty pants because who has time to wash those things every 2 days. I won’t remember the 3 trips to sporting goods store in 1 week to get all the things I didn’t realize we needed this season and how quickly all those things added up.

Instead I’ll remember that one hit of the season that made my boy feel like a star and put a look of pure joy on his face. I’ll remember the two outs he got in one game that made him want to play short stop forever and ever. I’ll remember leaning forward at my daughter’s recital so nobody saw my tears as I watched my sweet girl dance her heart out and I’ll remember how she watched that recital video over and over again afterwards for weeks.

How absolutely incredible it is that I get to be present for these moments. What a privilege it is to watch them grow.

I kind of feel like the secret to life might just be meeting each struggle with enough gratitude to find and appreciate the beauty hidden in the chaos. Admittedly, that’s sometimes easier said than done, but something I’ve been actively working on for the last 2 years.

See ya in November.